“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” — Matthew 6:33

Years ago, I used a classic illustration in a sermon: I placed a large glass jar on the table and set beside it some stones, pebbles, and sand. The lesson was simple—if you fill your life first with the small, inconsequential things (the sand), there’s no room left for what truly matters: relationships, family, and God. But if you start with the big things—the stones—you can then fit in the pebbles and even the sand around them.

After the sermon, as I was packing up, a friend came over and said with a grin, “Our fraternity president used that exact same illustration—but at the end, he poured a beer into the jar and shouted, ‘There’s always room for beer!’”

That memory still makes me laugh, but it carries a deeper truth. People will always find room for what they think is important.

I’ve found that most people who come to faith want to fit Jesus into their existing life. As I often say, a nominal Christian is someone who simply overlays religious practices onto a lifestyle they’ve already chosen. They accept Jesus—so long as they can keep their friend group, their job, their income level, their zip code, their political beliefs, their style, and everything they’ve already gained.

I’m currently reading a fictional account of Peter’s journey as a disciple. The author portrays Peter as a man struggling to figure out how to fit Jesus into his life. And as I read, I saw my own reflection—I, too, want to fit God into my plans, my goals, my vision.

But what if, instead, I let my life fit into His purposes, His goals, His plans?

As I reflect on family, ministry, and life, I have realized something: God had graciously granted many of my heart’s desires, but none of it happened the way I’d imagined. I dreamed of thru-hiking the Appalachian Trail by 30, of parenting two children (God multiplied that one with triplets!), of launching a fresh expression of church. Every one of those dreams was reshaped as I let God’s purposes shape my life, not the other way around.

Discipleship is about following Jesus, not directing Him. It’s about walking the next step with Him and letting Him lead us to the destination—not the one we scripted, but the one He has prepared.

These days, I’ve learned to ask a simple question: “What’s best next?”— this will determine one small step for me to take while trusting the outcomes to the Lord.

Where in your life are you still asking Jesus to fit into your plans, instead of letting Him lead you into His?